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小編: 64應(yīng)試類(lèi)寫(xiě)作,時(shí)間一般都比較緊張,時(shí)間再緊,也要留出兩三分鐘的時(shí)間把文章通讀一遍,進(jìn)行必要的修改。不要說(shuō)我們初學(xué)寫(xiě)作的人,就是大作家寫(xiě)完一個(gè)章節(jié)或一部小說(shuō)后都要反復(fù)讀上幾遍。在限時(shí)、緊張的寫(xiě)作中,出現(xiàn)錯(cuò)誤,尤其是語(yǔ)言上的錯(cuò)誤是不可避免的。如果把這些錯(cuò)誤留在那里,不得到改正,就會(huì)影響整篇文章的質(zhì)量。閱卷人雖然不大會(huì)按你文章中語(yǔ)言錯(cuò)誤的累計(jì)數(shù)目進(jìn)行扣分,但錯(cuò)誤,尤其是一些幼稚的錯(cuò)誤,會(huì)給閱卷人員留下不好的印象,從而影響文章的分?jǐn)?shù)。
那么修改應(yīng)注意哪些方面呢?從結(jié)構(gòu)方面來(lái)說(shuō):(1)看一看中心思想是不是突出?文章中有論述和材料是否都圍繞著這個(gè)中心思想展開(kāi)?如發(fā)現(xiàn)個(gè)別句子或例子游離于中心思想之外,甚至與中心思想發(fā)生沖突,就應(yīng)把它從文章中去掉。(2)看一看段與段之間,句與句之間是否連貫?銜接是否自然,或給人一種斷裂、跳躍的感覺(jué)?如發(fā)現(xiàn)這種情況,就要加一個(gè)句子或一些詞,或改變一下說(shuō)法,以求文章的連貫。
但就修改來(lái)說(shuō),是主要還是放在語(yǔ)言上,即語(yǔ)法和詞匯上。以下各例中,a)表示錯(cuò)誤的或不宜提倡的句子,b)表示正確的或值得模仿的句子。
9.句子的主謂賓是否齊全
例24
a) TV now plays an important role in our daily life, Because we cannot live without it.
b) TV now plays an important role in our daily life. because we cannot live without it.
中文用“因?yàn)椤币龅木渥涌梢元?dú)立,但英語(yǔ)不行,作為從句,只能附屬主句。
例25
a) There are many ways to contact with society. For example, join in clubs, taking parttime jobs and helping the poor.
b) There are many ways to contact with society, for example, joining clubs, taking parttime jobs and helping the poor.
for example 引出的應(yīng)是句子,如 For example we may join clubs, take part-time jobs and help the poor。有時(shí)也可不自立為句,跟在一個(gè)句子后面,借用主語(yǔ)。
例26
a) If no electricity, all activities such as watching TV and seeing movies will be impossible.
b) If there is no electricity, all activities such as wathcing TV and seeing movies will be impossible.
if no electricity(如果沒(méi)有電),但句中的no不是動(dòng)詞,也就是說(shuō)這個(gè)從句缺了謂語(yǔ)。
10.過(guò)渡詞是否用得合適
例27
a) Because some college graduates could not find a better job, so they decided to continue to read for a second degree.
b) As come college graduates could not find a better job, they decided to continue to read for a second degee.
漢語(yǔ)可以說(shuō) "因?yàn)?.....所以", 但英語(yǔ)不能連用"because...so".
例28
a) Although an opportunity is rare, but we must be ready to seize it.
b) Although an opportunity is rare, we must be ready to seize it.
同樣,漢語(yǔ)可以說(shuō)“雖然......但日”,而英語(yǔ)要么用although,要么用 but, 兩者不能同時(shí)用。
11.詞語(yǔ)的搭配是否正確
例29
a) We students should learn/study as much knowledge as possible.
b) We students should acquire/obtain as much knowledge as possible.
“學(xué)習(xí)知識(shí)”是考生作文中經(jīng)常要表達(dá)的,但不少人用錯(cuò)。英語(yǔ)中能和knowledge 搭配的是obtain, acquire, gain等。
例30
a) With a rise in the number of cars and buses, traffic in Shanghai has become more and more crowded.
b) With a rise in the number of cars and buses, traffic in Shanghai has become increasingly heavier.
traffic不和 crowded搭配,說(shuō) “交通擁擠繁忙”,應(yīng)說(shuō) traffic is heavy/busy.如同中文里的“速度快”,英語(yǔ)不說(shuō) "The speed of cars is fast/quick." 而是說(shuō)"The speed of cars is high/fantastic."或"cars are much faster."
例31
a) People begin to eat more vice food.
b) People begin to eat more non-staple foodstuff.
副總統(tǒng)是vice presidents, 副食品應(yīng)是 non-staple foodstuff, 而副經(jīng)理、副教授、副作用分別是 assistant managers, associate professors, side effects,搭配不同。
12.詞語(yǔ)是否用得得當(dāng)
例32
a) Actually, traffic jams have effected our daily life.
b) Actually, traffic jams have affected our daily life.
表示“不良影響”,動(dòng)詞用affect, 而不是effect。
例33
a) When old problems are solved, new problems will rise.
b) When old problems are solved, new problems will arise.
rise 是“起來(lái)”、“上升”的意思,arise 才是“出現(xiàn)”的意思。
例34
a) There are many factors leading to changes in people's diet. At first, people can afford expensive food.
b) There are many factors leading to changes in people's diet. First, people can afford expensive food.
At first 是“起先”的意思,暗示后來(lái)情況完全兩樣。表示“首先”,要用first。就如 highly 和 high 是兩個(gè)同的意思,前者是作“非?!苯?,后者是“高”的意思。Women have risen high in social status.不能用 highly。